sassyvalkyrie:

interstellarmage:

i knew this guy in middle school who when asked about his future plans, even by school counselors or teachers would without fail always chant,

KICK ASS, GO TO SPACE
REPRESENT THE HUMAN RACE

i wonder what he’s up to these days.

image

(via mellymel256)

kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails

(via mellymel256)

dangerhamster:

rnarker:

a man walks into a zoo. the only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. it’s a shitzu 

this is literally my favourite joke ever

(via redbullandcigarettes711)

madehimsaycomfychairs:

thebeauty-isa-beast:

curvellas:

my fall look today is winged eyeliner, plum lipstick, and a look on my face like i’m fucking your boyfriend and can’t wait for you to find out.

My fall look is simple liner with bold lashes, burgundy lipstick, a gleam in my  eyes that let’s men know that I’ll suck their dick, their money out of their bank accounts, and the souls right out of their bodies.

this is my favorite post on tumblr currently

(via redbullandcigarettes711)

haunthecause:

its fucking face omg

(Source: keeganallennews, via heytheredollface)

unclefather:

how she do that

unclefather:

how she do that

(Source: neachi, via heytheredollface)

(Source: campbasement, via geekycrap)

(via brimst0ne)

literallygoth:

wtf is wrong with this child?

literallygoth:

wtf is wrong with this child?

(via penpalwithbenefits)